The Hidden Grief of Change: Why Even Positive Life Events Can Feel Overwhelming

Embracing the Ups and Downs of Growth: Why Change Feels Hard, Even When It’s Good

Photo by Marcos Paulo Prado on Unsplash

Change is supposed to be exciting, right? 🎉 You get the new job, the dream house, the perfect relationship… and yet, instead of feeling only joy, you find yourself stressed, overwhelmed, or even a little… sad? 😕

If this sounds familiar, congratulations—you’re human. 🙃

We often think grief is reserved for bad things—losing a loved one, a breakup, or a major life setback. But what no one tells you is that even good changes can bring a sense of loss. And that’s totally normal.

Why Do We Grieve Positive Changes? 🤔

Every transition—whether it’s an exciting promotion, a big move, or even getting married—means saying goodbye to something. That something might be:

💼 Your old routine. Even if you hated your last job, at least you knew where the coffee machine was and how to fake-busy during Zoom calls.

🏡 Your comfort zone. Moving to a new city? Amazing. But now you have to find a new go-to coffee shop, gym, and that one grocery store aisle where you can stare at snacks for 20 minutes.

👯 Your old identity. Getting married, becoming a parent, or even just turning 30 (yikes) shifts the way you see yourself. Even if it’s a change you wanted, there’s still an adjustment period.

The Emotional Whirlwind of Change 🌪

Positive transitions can bring a weird mix of emotions:

✔️ Excitement 😃

✔️ Anxiety 😬

✔️ Nostalgia 🥺

✔️ "What have I done?" panic 🤯

It’s like ordering a new phone—exciting, but also slightly terrifying because what if you don’t like the new layout?!

How to Cope with Change (Without Losing Your Mind) 🧘‍♀️

If you’re in the middle of a life transition and feeling all the feelings, here’s how to navigate it:

🎭 Acknowledge the Grief

You can be thrilled about a new chapter and still feel sad about the last one ending. Let yourself process the emotions instead of forcing yourself to “just be happy.”

💬 Talk About It

No, you’re not ungrateful for struggling with a positive change. Share your feelings with a friend, therapist, or even a journal—it helps.

📉 Lower the Pressure

You don’t have to have everything figured out on Day 1. Adjusting to change takes time, whether it’s a new job, a big move, or figuring out how to be an adult. (Spoiler: none of us really know what we’re doing.)

🎉 Celebrate Small Wins

Give yourself credit for navigating change. Found your new favorite coffee shop? Success. Sent your first email at the new job without overthinking it for 45 minutes? Victory.

Takeaway: Change is Hard—Even the Good Kind

Life transitions are messy—and that’s okay. You’re allowed to feel overwhelmed, nostalgic, and even a little freaked out, even when everything is technically “going great.”

So if you’re in the middle of a big change, take a deep breath. You’re adjusting, growing, and figuring it out one step at a time. And that’s more than enough. 💛

Have you ever felt emotional over a positive change? Let’s talk about it in the comments! ⬇️

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post! If you found it helpful, I’d be incredibly grateful if you’d consider sharing it with others—it’s a small gesture that means a lot. Thank you for being here!

With gratitude,

Lavinia

Therapist & Life Coach